I will survive....

Well its been one week and one day since Matt and I broke up. And you know what? I think I'm going to make it. It's been a REALLY long, emotionally draining week, with a lot of yelling and screaming at each other, yet a lot of really, really great moments of "I remember why we love (D)? each other"....Today we said our final goodbyes (again). And it was absolutely incredibly sad. It's hard to let your best friend go ya know? But he said something that I think sums up exactly why we can't be together right now...."I can't be your best friend and your worst enemy at the same time"....and there is so much that is between us that needs time to heal. Time to take a step back and be thought about. Time to let anger go, and sadness go, and think about whether or not we truly make each other happy, and can in the long run. And we have morphed into each other's worst enemies, bringing out the worst versions of ourselves upon each other. That is NOT healthy.

So yes, hanging up that phone today was utterly painful. I felt as if part of me was being ripped off of my body. But I know, given some time, that the pain will heal, and this is for the better. For now, and forever really. We both have expressed how we would be ecstatic if our paths were to cross later and bring us back together, and that is a hope I will bury deep inside for later. But if they don't, I know that I experienced something truly special, and got to see parts of the world I never had before, with someone I loved. And I have lots of memories that will never be forgotten.

So yeah, today was incredibly sad. But it only has to get better from here, with us and with myself. And for that I am excited, and I know I will survive. (It's probably going to take a lot of drinks and tears in the near future, but I'm ok with that. )